Archive for the ‘job hunt depression’ Tag

Burying the Past

I might be in a bit of a slump. Saturday I put on a t-shirt to look presentable for my morning Human Behavior class. What my 4 classmates and my professor didn’t know was that I had sweatpants on throughout the class and I didn’t take them off the rest of the day. I was supposed to go to the gym Saturday too. I didn’t. Sunday wasn’t much different. Before the job loss I could count on Sunday to be very productive. Get up, go to the grocery store, do some laundry, go to the gym and go to bed. Get up and do the whole thing over again. Too bad the whole thing isn’t the same.

  Sure, cry me a river. I’m sad.  But I think I’ve found a symbolic resolution to this sadness. Much like a bad break-up I have decided to bury my past. Throughout my time with my previous organization I have amassed a few mementoes. I have three t-shirts, some papers and some training materials. The t-shirts I just haven’t had a chance to look at or throw out. The papers I pulled out in my harrumph to get out of the office and my training materials I brought home to write an organizational paper.

So, today, in this breezy sunny mild south Texas late winter day, I have decided to bury my previous employer to move on. I put on my black skirt, a black shirt and got a shovel. I went outside with the dogs following me. They were interested in my “stuff.” I had some scissors, a box to put the stuff in and nothing much else. I dug a rather large hole (the binder is a 3 inch binder), cut up the t-shirts and put them in the box with the papers.  I put all the stuff in the hole, covered it back up and said my good-byes.  I said good-bye to the mean people, the unnecessary drama, the lonely lunches, the unplanned and unexecuted fundraisers, and all the other things that just weren’t a good fit.

While I said my good-byes I also said a prayer. I said a prayer for a new beginning, a new start. Maybe the new beginning isn’t tomorrow or next week, but I asked for a new beginning.  I also asked for continued strength through this tough period because even though I know I said my good-byes, like the death of a loved one the loss of a job is not easy and I may be able to go to the grocery store and to the gym today, but maybe not tomorrow.

So I buried my past and I’m moving on to my future, whatever that may be. And I recommend that anyone who has gone through a bad job loss joins me in burying their past. It will only hold you back in the future.